Awesome, exactly 0 posts in November! It may be a new record. Why you ask? I have no idea. I have plenty of time, so I guess I just have nothing important to transmit? That cannot be right. I have been maintaining a fairly low profile, going to work, going to hockey, and that's about it.

So I was analyzing the old blogarooney here, and saw that there were 92 posts in 2007, that averages out to one every 3.96 days, and it wasn't all fluff, it was not just empty filler, it was quality. Then in 2008 the count dropped down to 49, or average of one post every 7.4 days. Then 2009 brought only 30, or 1 every 12.1 days. Counting this post, only 19 in 2010 thus far. So, every year the count roughly gets halved. Weird.

I read back over tons of posts from the last few years and I think I understand why I started this in the first place, and also why it has dwindled. Does this mean a complete renaissance of the blog? I am not sure yet. Does it mean an increased post count? probably.

I am pretty sure that I don't have less to say than I used to, and I am not completely lazy. I think that I sort of got a form of writer's block. It has not just happened here, I mostly stopped writing pieces for my book, short stories, and all kinds of other things I was working on. I am even having a hard time writing articles for a gaming site that I write articles for sometimes. My biggest issue is that I over analyze and criticize my own work. This applies to almost every aspect of my life. I over analyze every purchase I make, I over analyze every food I cook, I pre and post analyze conversations I have with people. I have done this for most of my life.

I cannot help it, I am a analytical type of dude I guess. Also, I understand that there is not anything wrong with that. It allows me to become better, and make wiser decisions. The downside in my mind is that it may be interfering with my ability to just... be.

I was watching an episode of CSI last night, and Ray Langston was talking to Nick Stokes about Erich Fromm's philosophy on "having" versus "being". It was strangely quite moving. The episode revolved around a hoarder, so Langston was explaining the difference between a having type of personality and a being type personality and the potential pitfalls and that sometimes people go to extremes either way. So the hoarder just took her 'having' personality to a strange level.

A while back I read the book "Yes Man" by Danny Wallace and it changed my entire lifestyle. I realized that I was a having type and not a being type, but I always wanted to be being. After that I strived to at least become half having, half being. Hence, the 'awesome summer' was born, along with many other unscheduled and unplanned outings. I have gotten away from that, and I realize it now, thanks to Ray Langston. I have trained myself not to be 'having' so much. I have paid off credit cards debts, and I really don't buy anything anymore, unless I absolutely need it. I don't buy a fancy new TV just because I can. Some people might stop me there and say part of being is just not worrying about money and buying things as I see fit. True, however, buying useless things, to replace perfectly good things, leans more towards having than being. Being, would be going to the store and looking at the TV's versus buying one. The adventure could be the reward more so than the possession.

So a renewed effort begins to just say "fuck it", and be, and invariably, that will result in more writing.